Happy Monday y’all. Boy did I have an insane weekend. Tom has been gone now for 2 weeks and all I’ve got to say is – MAD KUDDOS to single parents! Woof! But it’s getting me ready for a very long baseball season so we’ll call this my spring training ha ha. Parker and I will leave for Florida in a few days to meet up with Tom so I’m packing (or supposedly packing) and cleaning. And to top it all off – I just released my newest collection for SoLayne Designs yesterday. Yep – I didn’t really sleep much this weekend. But its ok – that’s what Florida is for 😉
Ok – so today’s MomminMonday post is going to be a little different. But bear with me. It’s still a mom related topic. Just a little different. I recently started sharing more on my personal/blog IG about my jewelry business. And “the people” seemed a little intrigued. So I ran a poll asking if anyone wanted to know more about my business, starting a small business, and/or running a small business while being a mom. And I’m not gonna lie – I was completely blown away! Almost every single person voted yes, they wanted to know more!
So here I am! I’m going to run a little series of posts about my business. And I figured I would start with an intro to what SoLayne Designs stands for and how it got started.
Rewind to the baseball season of 2016. Parker was a baby and we were in Boston where one would assume I was super happy. And for some reason I wasn’t. I’ve written about it a little here and there, but honestly I was in a really low place. We had amazing friends there, a healthy baby, and Tom was having a great season. So what was my problem? I struggled constantly with being under-fulfilled as a stay-at-home-mom. My child slept a lot and quite frankly – I was bored. My mind was bored.
I had toyed with the idea of an ETSY shop back in spring training but the ideas I had were ones that I couldn’t exactly execute. For example, I was obsessed with kids clothes (and was spending a fortune on them) so I convinced myself that I could get a sewing machine and make clothes and leather moccasins. Lets be real! I can’t sew. Heck, Tom can sew better than I can! And the thought of sitting in front of a sewing machine sounded pretty boring. So the ideas left and I settled into baseball season as a wife and a mom constantly traveling to see my family in NC. And constantly feeling “less than” my potential.
Let me digress for a second – stay with me! I am in NO way saying that being a stay at home mom is a “less than your potential” role. Let me tell you – its the hardest damn job anyone will ever do. You are a cook, maid, laundry mat, chauffeur, counselor, dietician, veterinarian, did I mention maid, accountant, and the list goes on and on. And you are highly UNDER appreciated in every department. I’ve been there, done it, got that tee shirt! You have to be a jack of all trades and it is harder than any “away from the home” job I’ve ever done! I’m just saying that for me, I couldn’t find personal fulfillment in that. And I struggled with the guilt of those feelings HEAVILY (I wrote about it once here).
Ok – back on track – so it’s July. My family has experienced our second MAJOR tragedy in less than 2 years plus my little sister got married, so I was at home with family when Tom calls to say he’s been put on waivers and we will be changing teams. Aka: moving. CRUSHED! I was literally crushed. The only thing that seemed to make me happy these days was time with “my girls” in Boston. All the wives and their kiddos. We were a VERY close family. So fast forward – beyond me being crushed and boxing up our house and moving us, by myself, to NYC where he was now going to be a New York Yankee.
Well folks – this life isn’t always that glamorous. It was August and no one in New York will rent to you for 2, possibly 3, months for anything less than like $10k/month. Yea. Absurd. So we found ourselves in a ONE BEDROOM extended stay hotel room about 45 mins north of the city. We had a 10month old who took 2 highly coveted naps each day and one car (because we shipped the other home with 3/4 of our crap that we couldn’t fit into our hotel room). So Tom ended up taking the car to work every day around 1pm and returning between 11pm and midnight depending on the game. So I was stuck. All day long. In a little burrough of the city with a kid and a stroller. And I thought I was under fulfilled before. Ba ha ha ha ha.
There came a point in time when Tom finally got the guts to address my personal hygiene…or lack there of. He brought it to my attention that I wasn’t showering for several days at a time, never wearing makeup, and rarely putting on anything other than workout clothes. Well folks – thats what happens when you feel a “little” down on yourself. Here I am, a dentist mind you, and I’m quite literally TRAPPED in a hotel room and the 4 square blocks surrounding it all for what? So my husband can have a career. A career I don’t even get to celebrate or enjoy because he’s always gone. I’ve worked my ass off to get a doctorate degree and THIS is what I’m doing with my life. (incase you hadn’t realized —- these were my thoughts at the time)
So at the request of my mother, who knew I was about to rip out all of my hair, I jumped online one day to order stones and wire to attempt making some wire bangles for her friends. Since I took a few wire bending courses in dental school, she was fully convinced I could make some bangles for her to give as gifts. She was also convinced that I needed a hobby. ha ha. But in her defense, I did work at the most adorable accessory boutique in high school and college where we were often privy to jewelry making skills and tools of the owner. So there was good chance that I could figure this out.
So stones and wire led to arrowheads and gemstones. It lead to YouTube jewelry making tutorials, jewelry packaging research, and inquiries about wholesale supplies. In the words of Tom: It quickly led to an “obsession.” So by the end of August I had designed and created my first pieces. With LOTS of trial and error, but even more dedication. I created a secret Instagram account and starting engaging with strangers, careful not to “follow” anyone I actually knew, to gauge the interest in my products.
Confession: I felt a little, ok a lot, silly doing this! Again, lets go back to the me being a dentist thing. So now, not only am I “living the dream” as a professional athletes wife, but I am now stringing beads during nap time and secretly hustling them on Instagram. Like WTH? This is NOT my life. I was MUCH too embarrassed to share it with anyone.
But as much as I felt silly or stupid, I can’t deny that I suddenly felt like I had a purpose. I had a drive for something. I was creating something! I was engaging with other women on social media. The most social interaction I had had in months (lame I know). And seeing other people purchase, wear, and proudly post something I created was a feeling I’d never felt before. Its kinda like someone ooo-ing and aaaah-ing over your baby. You’re standing there proudly like “heck yea. I created that thing. From scratch.” So I quickly found myself with a little pep in my step. I would throw on a pair of jeans and a white tee shirt but the minute I put on some statement tassel earrings, or a gorgeous turquoise arrowhead necklace I felt like a million bucks. I looked like a mom who really had it together. I looked like I knew style and fashion trends and like I had taken time to “get dressed” for the day. It’s amazing what accessories alone can do for an outfit. These beads and arrowheads completely pulled me out of my funk.
Only a handful of VERY close family members knew about my secret gig. And after showing them the pieces, they were floored. My sister in law actually bought every single one of my first creations and wore them to Napa Valley on a vacation. And thanks to her photos I finally had some decent Instagram content. ha ha. With the encouragement of my mom and sister, I created an ETSY shop and in November I shared it “with the world” (aka Facebook). To say I was shocked at the response is an understatement! From November through December I quite literally didn’t sleep. I was sick the entire month of December and I stayed in our basement “sweat shop” working all day and all night. The orders were flowing in and I had 3 boutiques carrying my stuff within the first 2 months. BLOWN AWAY.
So since then, SoLayne Designs has grown and changed tremendously. In ways I never imagined possible. And I’ll touch on all of these in other posts, but the moral of the story is to surround yourself with like minded people. No matter what you’re doing. Find your tribe and love them hard. And they will love you back. From customers to employees to the people you purchase your supplies from. I now have a website and my boutique accounts are growing each month.
I still don’t know the first thing about business or running a business, but I know that I love it. I know that it fills a major void in my life. I know that nothing makes me happier than waking up on Sunday morning to text messages and social media tags of people wearing my creations. And feeling damn good about themselves! THAT is what SoLayne Designs is all about. The fact that every single woman, from the high powered business executive to the stay at home mom of 5, deserves to feel good about herself. And some days, all it takes is a bold accessory to achieve that. Putting on a trendy piece of jewelry, making a statement with confidence, and possibly even drawing a compliment from someone along the way – THAT can make all the difference in the world. It did for me.
I can completely relate to the not feeling fulfilled as a stay at home mom. I’m not crafty at all but it’s why I started my blog. I needed an outlet and something I looked forward to doing. You are amazing!
Really well written and explained. I didn’t know. You are doing a super job and everything is so pretty. So happy for your success. Can’t wait to see you next trip to NC. It’s crazy next door but progressing. Love you loads.
Thank you so much for this behind the scenes peek at SoLayne Designs! I’m glad you found a creative outlet that you are so passionate about – and we all get to benefit! Yay!